Sunday, February 27, 2011

Reader's Write: Culver's 6 Wishes

We couldn't resist sharing this from our inbox:

Just noticed in the latest bimonthly installment of Dr. Tim's Daily Dose of Bad Medicine* that he "empathizes" with the teachers on the issue of skipping work.  This is wrong.  He means he "sympathizes" with them.

Sympathy is having feeling for someone/something.  Empathy is sharing someone's feelings/situation.  Dr. Tim didn't play hookie last week, and teachers would LOVE to share Dr. Tim's retirement situation.  They are looking at paying half of their retirement, and he has a steady check coming and a Scrooge McDuck vault of bonus cash that he is trying to sweeten a little more.

How much sweeter is a matter of speculation.  What we do know is that he has two old lamps, possibly looted from the Cairo Museum during the recent uprising.  We know there are two lamps, because each genie grants three wishes, and Dr. Tim has six wishes. Assuming Dr. Tim's math skills are better than his vocab skills, he should be able to divide six wishes by three per genie and come up with two lamps.

If so, ali Whalen and ali Seabass are wearing turbans and floating in a puff of smoke and refusing to divulge the nature of the wishes.  I guess we won't know what he asked for until 1) he gets it and they have to tell us;  2) ali Whalen and ali Seabass develop a little respect for open government and community engagement and share the wishes with the people who will be funding the wishes; or, 3) we actually see the twelve-inch pianist.

Hopefully, we can catch those slippery genies and each get six wishes.  I would only need four:  end world hunger, bring world peace, a Scrooge McDuck vault, and a twelve-inch pianist.  Then you would wish you could empathize with me.

* Culver's blog, "InspirED", aka ConspirED, backfirED, haywirED, misfirED, quagmirED, retirED, vampirED, tripwirED, underwirED, and just plain tirED (not to mention heavy on the ED)