Saturday, February 9, 2013

NitPickers Anonymous

Ya know...

Dr. Culver has a history-- both publicly and privately-- of accusing us of "nitpicking".  Our first internalized response is usually one of, "For a highly educated guy, THAT'S the best he can do?"

But then we think a little more and what we think we think is that the origin of the word "nit pick" stems from the very old practice of "picking" the "nits" (or eggs of head lice) from someone's hair.

And then we stop and think some more and realize that if Dr. Culver is accusing us of nit picking, then there most certainly must be nits for us to pick.  So, really, when the good doctor accuses us of nitpicking, it really appears to be some Freudian slip in which he admits that nits--and therefore lice--exist within the district.  After all, it's not like he accuses us of "phantom nitpicking", which we would think would refer to the practice of picking at nits which don't actually exist.  How's that for logic?   See what a little early morning, exceptionally bold, dark cup of coffee can do?

Going with our theory then, it would behoove (don't you just LOVE that word?) Dr. Culver to invest in an industrial sized container of "RID" and get to work, n'est ce pas?

"Behoove you" courtesy of Two and a Half Men

There ARE nits that need to be picked.  Sorry if that tarnishes the image of the district, Dr. Culver, but if nits are not properly dealt with they only beget more...nits...right?

What's say we declare 2013 to be the year we RID the district of nits so that the district can cease the embarrassing public itching.